chillin

so heaa I am chillin again at work, kind of need based kind of voluntary again....I realized today that I still want to grow maybe go back to school and develop before I take on responsibilities even like being respoinsible for the final "correct" construction document set. Life feels so much nicer if you're not blogged down by such responsibilities...or at least I wouldn't mind them if the "blog down" work was inspirational.
I must be free, I want to be free and I want to know how it feels not to have security (well to a certain degree:) but how it feels to make it on your own. I'm so intrigued and can't wait to see how will I manage on my own, to arrange my life to work out a plan and to let loose.
I feel I have 99% of the brain unutilized and in dier need of filling in with all sorts of experiances and knowledge to grow and shape myself into someone self-sufficient and productive.

On the other hand my nails have grown quite long and I noticed I'm playing with them from time to time, maybe that's also oe of the resons why I didn't have hem long before because I tend to look at them more and pay more attention to them that takes time away from other things...silly.