loves on my mind again...but yet I don't have a hold of it

...no this is not borrowed from my friend's friend....dot, dot, dot:) these are BG's dot's:)
thinking about how to start the blog still. And still not having a complete reign of my thoughts. Maybe I'll never will. Sometime I feel I'll be in the mercy of whatever my mind pops out at the momet for all my life....I don't drink coffee, yet I feel like the head is under a constand caffeeine overdose and the thoughts are just floating out there in high altitude and if I'm lucky a certain thought cloud decides to float lower and be reachable....
....so here I am...end of work day and just read a smal paragrapgh on love on my best friendster's blog and now I'm feeling thoughtful. Why is the most ideal of human passions eluding me for so long already. Is it waiting until I'm ready? Is it sensing that I have not yet defined myself and that I'm unaware still of implications, folds and abysses that come with love?
When am I going to be ready? Well will I know that it isn't a mare enfatuation that I'm feeling but that I have love in my heart and infront of me?