just for me:)

...I'm sitting at the computer and wondering over my own silliness. Ok. Let's start out by saying that when I was small when I got angry at someone my reaction was to not speak to them. And the person I was angry with could pretty much see it in my face that I wasn't happy with them.
I don't remember now how long did it usually take for me to resolve the situation or how did it usually end. I'm not sure much has changed in my behavious now...but today I realized the truth of the saying" Time heals all things" for me:) The longer I wait the less anger remains. I think time wipes away the causes of argument and the facial expressions and the cirumstance. And I can feel better each day and realize it isn't a big deal, life keeps going on and arguments come and go and there will never be end to them but it is allright.
Yesterday I also realized that anger does more harm for me than I remember. It sharpens my illness, maybe it has to do something with tension and anxiety that confrontation brings on, but I don't need any of that in my life and neither my head. I want to breeth freely and feel free and be free with myself. Not to be confused with the freedom that I don't have anyways in this society, but inner freedom that I can stil govern.
Head feels so heavy today though, I should get more than 7 hours of sleep tonight. Maybe spring is taking it's toll on my body. Maybe life is taking a toll on my body. Taking a toll, is it like taxing our bodies like car's once we go through the time machine, the more time we have the more of our vigour we have to give up in this life?